a big 40

So it was my 40th birthday on Dec 24, 2024.

It was supposed to be a day to remember but I was not in a good mood. I don't want the next year to be the same as the past 2 years so we ( ie, N & me) have decided it's gonna be different. We are getting our bike and going places. I just hope the plan doesn't stay just another plan and we get moving.

To 2025

All that we need

 All that we need 

is a place filled with love

All that we need

is a home filled with laughter

All that we need 

is a home to share the warmth

All that we need

is a place to hoard our books

All that we need

is a person we called 'home'

All that we need

Is a place called home

Into the 40s

As on December 2024 I would be entering the 40. So 2025 is going to be about the change I would like to bring. It's about travel and lots of soul searching. I am tired of waiting for the curtains for fall or whatever it is called. So this year I am gonna travel

One year

 It's been one year since the incident that led to a everlasting change in my life. An year of the lowest I had ever been.An year of recovery where it is not yet over but I am happy to be alive. Just alive but not exactly happy. An year where I came to know who my true friends are. I am still struggling with my every day life, finding it difficult to say words properly and still having difficulty in getting proper sentences but I am striving every day.

It's been a year of stroke affected food habits high restrictions on things I used to take lightly before. 

I am still trying to get sentences together but I am getting there. I have a long way to go...but I will be there

work-life balance

I work in an institution that talks highly about work- life balance.

They exhibit the importance of taking care of our family by posting us in different centres every 3 years

My supervisor starts 'whatsapping' me as early as 7am about the tasks and the targets while I'm busy in the kitchen not realising that others have more to life than just work. And of course as per the company policy, WhatsApp is not an official mode of communication.

Everyday, there is some 'login day' and if not achieved what follows is the most demeaning mode of meetings where a human is ridiculed infront of all her colleagues. Somehow, this is an acceptable norm here. 

The concept of enjoying my work is non existent and I no longer enjoy going to my work place

All these thought have been looming in my head for a very long time when I heard the news about a colleague/ friend. A gentleman, a senior, a soft spoken guy who never got involved in any branch politics and mainly kept to himself has been pushed to the edge of taking his own life due to work pressure. He had hardly 10 months of service left and this single thing is what people will recollect of him and not the 30+ years of untarnished work he has done 

Sad state of affairs with no hopes of recovery

I wish I could do something to change the way it's progressing but I am just getting pulled deeper into this shift with no way out

The forgotten art of writing letters

Writing letters...I would say it's a dying art. It's sad the beauty of a well drafted hand written letter will not be available to the younger generation.

The only post we recieve nowadays are the bills and notices, i can't remember the last time I got a well crafted personal letter from anyone. There was a time when I would recieve beautiful long letters from my friends but it no longer exists. 

The world of texting, WhatsApp and other technologies have taken over our lives. I agree that it's real time, convenient and we can share more than just words. Express through photos and emoticons. But i still miss the beauty of a letter or a note that's complete with small gifts or the small hearts we drew before emoticons came.

I wish I could write to someone like before and they would reply to me in their new letterpad which smells like roses and is filled with love. Not a love for me alone but for the forgotten art of writing letters

I dreamt of you

I dreamt of you last night

How you stood under a tree

And waited for me to see

I dreamt coz i saw your name

In another dame

A name i try to forget

But lives in my breath

I dreamt of you last night

And i wanted to run to you

Just to feel you

To hug you, to kiss you

To whisper " I missed you"

I dreamt of you last night

And i didn't want to wake up

For the fear of loosing you...again