the big burden, those sleppless nights, those beautifully printed papers and those answer sheets for which i will get the highest in cleanliness...its all over.a year has gone by and i still feel i havent learnt anything...is it natural?
i will be doing my specialisation from this year and i feel i am not ready for it?
im tensed...about the world outside...i have seen the nasty part of amny things but i have never seen the nasty part of corporate sector...only the good ones i have seen.
i know the reason that all students are sent on internships is to make them understand "its a nasty world out there and you better be prepared"
i think i am too protected in life
Friday, June 23, 2006
Saturday, June 10, 2006
the best day of my life
today is the best day of my life...i met my best friend after a gap of 5 years...the last time we met we were in 11th and now we both are doing my master's...it was fun although i had to wait in front of Bangalore Central from 9-10 (i made sure that all the shops do open and the guards in ICICI Bank wont forget me soon).she had come with her sister and we went to garuda mall and then it was chumma roaming...we were talking all this time and the places we went were the least important.but it was fun.we were talking about the past...how i was made to sit next to her by our ma'am in 9th std coz i was very talkative and at the end of the year ma'am realised her mistake coz i made all the people around me talkative...it was good coz through that i got a friend for life...she left after her 10th to Kuwait and did her graduation in Bangalore...at that time i promised her that i will reach b'lore...but when i came she went to Chennai.
it was always she who used to write to me first because i was always home while she went roaming throughout the world and this time when i went home for four days i got her letter (after almost an year) and when she told me that she is reaching b'lore i was very excited(she didnt know that i was studying in b'lore)and today we finally met.
this is a relation that i am very proud about for a simple fact that we studied together for only 10 months but we kept the friendship going through letters(and at times calls) for the past 5 years.there were times when we never wrote for months together but still she will write with her new address and we again will begin writing as if nothing happened.the gap when we never had touch with eachother never made us apart but brought us more and more close and i know i am very very lucky to get a friend like her...she is a gem to be treasured forever and ever and i know as the years go by our relation will grow and i always pray for that...and also pray that she will comeback to b'lore
i dont know how good i have been in expressing my feelings but there are certain things that can only be felt and not expressed with words and this is one.
you might say this is very pecular from my last blog where i say that i am detached from all my friends and now i sound as if i am very close to this girl...well let me clarify that by saying i am very detached from her because there were times in the past one year where i used to wonder where this girl is and why she is not writing to me but i never cried over it and that is detachement for me.
it was always she who used to write to me first because i was always home while she went roaming throughout the world and this time when i went home for four days i got her letter (after almost an year) and when she told me that she is reaching b'lore i was very excited(she didnt know that i was studying in b'lore)and today we finally met.
this is a relation that i am very proud about for a simple fact that we studied together for only 10 months but we kept the friendship going through letters(and at times calls) for the past 5 years.there were times when we never wrote for months together but still she will write with her new address and we again will begin writing as if nothing happened.the gap when we never had touch with eachother never made us apart but brought us more and more close and i know i am very very lucky to get a friend like her...she is a gem to be treasured forever and ever and i know as the years go by our relation will grow and i always pray for that...and also pray that she will comeback to b'lore
i dont know how good i have been in expressing my feelings but there are certain things that can only be felt and not expressed with words and this is one.
you might say this is very pecular from my last blog where i say that i am detached from all my friends and now i sound as if i am very close to this girl...well let me clarify that by saying i am very detached from her because there were times in the past one year where i used to wonder where this girl is and why she is not writing to me but i never cried over it and that is detachement for me.
Friday, June 09, 2006
friendship and emotions
well...thats a very dificult concept for me...its a concept alright coz i dont feel it.there was a time when i used to live for my friends but my first year in graduation taught me that its just not worth it.we expect our "best friends" to be with you when you are all alone but no they never are.i know many people will disagree with this statement but there is a simple thing that life has taught me- you are born alone and you will live alone and die alone.i have made many friends but I never get emotionally involved with anyone.this makes me happy and when they leave me suddenly I never feel sad…I know when someone leaves me someother person will come.i know the new person cannot replace the other.yesterday, one of my friends and I had a fight and he left me forever.but im not hurt and when he called me at 2.30AM I just kept my phone on silent.i don’t wish to talk to this guy who cannot understand me and is not ready to listen to me.
Im not sad neither am I happy…im leading my life same as ever and today I deleted all his mails from my inbox(I had a folder in his name with atleast 50 mails of his)…now what do you think I am?some people think im very cold-hearted and some say I have a heart of stone.no that’s not true coz I love my family a lot(that’s only my dad, mom, sis, grandma) and im very attached to them(don’t show it much) and if something happens to them then I know I will never be able to tolerate it….
Im not sad neither am I happy…im leading my life same as ever and today I deleted all his mails from my inbox(I had a folder in his name with atleast 50 mails of his)…now what do you think I am?some people think im very cold-hearted and some say I have a heart of stone.no that’s not true coz I love my family a lot(that’s only my dad, mom, sis, grandma) and im very attached to them(don’t show it much) and if something happens to them then I know I will never be able to tolerate it….
Wednesday, June 07, 2006
Fanaa
i was just watching Fanaa.the hindi movie by Kunal Kohli which is a big hit in India at present.
i could find only 2 reasons o watch this movie:
1)superb dialogues.i actually cant believe that a person who has made movies like HumTum(not that its bad)can actually write such beautiful shayaris and Aamir Khan has done a beautiful part in delivering these.
2)KAJOL.she looks goregeous. she rocks in this movie and i am happy that she has made a comeback.the hindi movie industry was really missing this talented actress.i hope she sticks around and entertain us with lots more of good movies.
the main 2 songs are good(mere haath mein and suhan alla)
the story line is a bit too exaggerated and at times hard to believe...a good movie but im happy i didnt waste money in a theatre and stuck our old comp lab
i could find only 2 reasons o watch this movie:
1)superb dialogues.i actually cant believe that a person who has made movies like HumTum(not that its bad)can actually write such beautiful shayaris and Aamir Khan has done a beautiful part in delivering these.
2)KAJOL.she looks goregeous. she rocks in this movie and i am happy that she has made a comeback.the hindi movie industry was really missing this talented actress.i hope she sticks around and entertain us with lots more of good movies.
the main 2 songs are good(mere haath mein and suhan alla)
the story line is a bit too exaggerated and at times hard to believe...a good movie but im happy i didnt waste money in a theatre and stuck our old comp lab
due to public demand
i was chatting with my sister yesterday and she told me that im the most complex person in the whole family...i asked her to explain how but sadly she couldnt.i wonder why she feels that...is it coz she doesnt know me well(but i am very much like her)or is it coz she never tried to understand(possibility).i am pretty sure my Mom wont agree to wha she said coz according to her my sister is very complex and we will never understand what she is thinking while i am very expressive and open...i thought about this a lot yesterday(its better than studying media laws) and i reached at a conclusion...all humans are very complex and one person cannot understand the other as a whole coz sometimes as humans we will never understand ourselves well so how can we understand other humans...what do you say?
Tuesday, June 06, 2006
exams
im supposed to be studying now..but im not as u can see for the simple reason that i dont feel like it.i really wish to know who brought the theory of exams into this world...whoever he/she is i really wish to kill that person(lucky he/she is coz they didnt have to die a HORRIBLE death)i also wish to know who brought the theory of "education" into the world...now i know that India has a long history of "gurukulam" education and i really support that coz its more practical...thats what we need...dont u feel so? i love studying...especially law and maths(but im no genius anyone who knows me can vouch for that)and tommorrow it is law for me but i just dont feel like studying and if i flunk i have to reappear the next year(another crappy system i say)...what do i do?
life is...
life is flowing
in some direction...
i just cant realise
where its takin me
im a confused soul
u kno y?
coz i dont ko directions
im bad in it
i wak up late...so dont kno my east
and i sleep early...so which is west?
as for the rest...they depend on these
and i depend on my instinct
which always cheats me in these...
hehehe....help me
get me a compass someone
my birthday is on...30 feb 3050
in some direction...
i just cant realise
where its takin me
im a confused soul
u kno y?
coz i dont ko directions
im bad in it
i wak up late...so dont kno my east
and i sleep early...so which is west?
as for the rest...they depend on these
and i depend on my instinct
which always cheats me in these...
hehehe....help me
get me a compass someone
my birthday is on...30 feb 3050
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